Kironide Dreams

(Also After the Credits: Plato's Stepchildren)

By Ster Julie

Rating: PG
Codes: S, Mc, Ch

A/N: Okay, with a big enough shoehorn, this could also be New Bride 4.5. It is set near the end of the 5 yr. Mission.

--ooOoo--

Spock found himself in sickbay, a pillow clutched tightly to his belly, his body drenched in perspiration, his chest heaving with each gasp.

"Spock?" Dr. McCoy said, placing a hand on the Vulcan's sweat-soaked hair.

"What's happening?" Spock asked weakly.

"You had an allergic reaction to the kironide," McCoy explained.

"Is Christine all right?"

McCoy's eyebrow skyrocketed at Spock's use of the nurse's given name. "Christine?"

"Yes," Spock rasped. "Is she well? Where is she?"

"I suppose she's fine," McCoy answered, puzzled.

"You suppose!" Spock echoed.

"She's not on duty for another two hours," the doctor replied.

Spock turned a tired, puzzled gaze toward McCoy.

"What is she doing on duty?" he questioned. "Shouldn't she be recovering?"

"What should she be recovering from?" McCoy asked.

Spock sighed in frustration. "She just lost the baby!"

McCoy's mouth opened in surprise. "What baby?"

Spock's brows drew together in pain. "Ours," he replied, wondering why McCoy was being so difficult. "You delivered her. She was too small to survive."

McCoy crossed his arms. "When was this baby supposedly conceived?" he asked.

Spock was getting annoyed. "You were there."

"I was?"

"Yes," Spock replied, "on Platonius. They made us have intercourse."

"No, they didn't," the doctor countered.

"Yes, they did!" Spock maintained.

"No, Spock, it didn't happen."

"It happened when the captain and Lt. Uhura were kissing," Spock insisted.

"Believe me, Spock" McCoy assured, "I saw it all. While Jim and Uhura were kissing, you and Christine were frozen in place."

"But I saw the pain on her face," Spock continued. "I . . . felt . . . her. I felt what happened to me."

"Truly, it didn't happen," McCoy soothed.

"But Christine became pregnant," Spock continued. "She lost the baby, a daughter, at 14 weeks. I assisted you in her delivery. The baby tried to take a breath, but she was just too small. We both held her as she died."

"Spock," McCoy said in calming tones. "Now, listen to me. You had a very high fever. You are remembering your hallucinations. You imagined all of this. There never was a baby. You and Christine never had intercourse. It's only been a few days since we left Platonius."

Spock raised confused eyes to McCoy. "But it was so real. The baby's face was so beautiful. The pain we felt at her passing was so acute."

"Look, I'll call Christine down here," McCoy suggested. "You can see she's fine. But first, let's get you cleaned up. You've sweated through your clothes, and quite frankly, Spock, you stink." You're weak, so I'll give you a hand myself, okay?"

Spock sighed. "Very well." He paused. "There was no baby?" he asked.

McCoy shook his head. "No baby. Are you disappointed?"

Spock considered. "In a way, yes."

McCoy was surprised. "Really?"

"While I regretted the circumstances of her conception," Spock admitted, "she did draw me to Christine. I saw her through new eyes."

McCoy considered this. "Does this mean that you are attracted to Christine?"

"Do deny it would be . . . "

"I know," McCoy interrupted. "'To deny it would be illogical.'"

Spock drew himself up. "I was going to say, to deny it would be a lie."

McCoy thought a while as he helped Spock get cleaned up and changed. "Maybe you should take some time to think about this, to take a step back," the doctor suggested. "You need to separate the dream from the reality."

Spock considered the doctor's advice. "Perhaps you are right," he said. "Will you say anything to Christine?"

"I promise you, Spock," McCoy vowed, "I will not breathe a word to her."

--6 months later--

McCoy put Nurse Christine Chapel's bag on the transporter pad, "So, this is goodbye," he said.

Christine shook her head. "Why does this have to be goodbye?" she asked. "It's just so long for now."

McCoy took her hands in his. "Good luck in med school," he wished her. "Do us proud."

Christine smiled. "I'll do my best," she promised.

McCoy looked back at the doors, as if expecting someone else to arrive.

"Has Spock said goodbye yet?" he asked.

Christine lowered her head to hide her hurt. "No," she said simply.

"Has he spoken to you lately?" McCoy continued.

Christine sniffed away her pain. "He hasn't said a damn word to me since Platonius," she replied bitterly.

McCoy was surprised. "Really?"

"Yes," Christine continued in the same tone. "I guess I truly must be repulsive to him."

McCoy looked again at the door. "Oh, I wouldn't be so sure if I was you."

Christine looked at the doctor with suspicion. "Oh?" she asked. "And what would you know about that?"

McCoy whipped his head back guiltily. "Uh, nothing. I'm sure he was just delayed."

Christine moved to the transporter pad. And I'm sure he's only too glad to be rid of me." She checked the chrono. "Look, my shuttle's about to board. Tell Spock I wish him well." Christine gave the doctor a brief hug. "Goodbye, Leonard," she said. "Thanks for everything."

"'Bye, Chris," McCoy replied. "Safe trip."

-

Spock met Doctor McCoy as he left the transporter room.

"You just missed Chris," the doctor said. "Why didn't you ever tell her how you felt?"

Spock looked down. "I couldn't find the words."

McCoy steered the Vulcan to the transporter room. "Well, you'd better find the words fast, Spock," he said. "She's already at the shuttle port. You'd best hurry."

-

Spock beamed down into a deluge. This ancient shuttle port still used open-air boarding ramps. He peered through the pouring rain, desperately searching for Nurse Chapel.

"Christine!" he called, trying to be heard over the storm. "Christine!"

"Spock!" the nurse replied as she heard her name. "It's raining buckets! What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't let you go without saying farewell," he shouted over the drumming rain.

"That's it?" Christine asked in amazement. "You're risking pneumonia just to say goodbye?"

Spock shook his head. "I couldn't let you go without telling you that I care for you."

Christine dropped her carry-on to the ground. "Now?" she shouted. "You drop this on me now?" She looked at the shuttle as the last of the other passengers filed inside. "I've got to go before I miss my shuttle," she said in a hurry. "Look, Spock, you don't want me. Go find yourself the Vulcan wife you've always wanted."

"I had a Vulcan wife," Spock protested. "I'd rather have you."

Christine shook her head. "No, you don't," she said as she neared the doors. "Take care of yourself, Spock."

Spock stood in the pouring rain, watching as the shuttle closed its doors and took off.

"Peace, Christine," he whispered at last.

-

Christine watched Spock standing at the launch pad until she couldn't see him anymore.

What have I done? she thought.

FIN

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